I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
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