ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
