pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
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