I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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