Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
