Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
