i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Randomize