Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
