Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
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