Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Randomize
