For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Just invented taco cereal.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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