i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
