why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Randomize