i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize