would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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