your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
