would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
