I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Me. At least after what I've been through.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Randomize
