your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
the day after is always just damage control
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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