There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Randomize
