a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
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