So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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