is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
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I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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