Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Randomize