I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
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