i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Randomize
