i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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