Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
