They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
