If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
