So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
