Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
