You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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