sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
someone threw a dead crab at me
Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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