Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
