did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Randomize
