When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Randomize
