oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
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