playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
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