If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
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