Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
