We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
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