Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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