ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize
