i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
