Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
You're a waste of cheezeits
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
