You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I love you.
Bad choice
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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