why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Randomize
