when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
