I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
