What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Randomize
