the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
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