I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Randomize
